This is another post that was written a few years ago. My journey figuring on this parenting thing is still changing.
Every expectant mom has their idea of what motherhood is going to be like. It usually involves some idealistic vision of a sweet calm baby, who smiles and laughs all the time, wears adorable outfits, and nurses perfectly. You see yourself taking this charming bundle of joy to the park for picnics with your husband or imagine them playing (or sleeping) happily while you continue to cook gourmet meals and have a spotless house (like that even happened before the baby). Lastly, you (I!) expect many things to stay the same, namely your relationship with your spouse. All of that is well and good, and don’t get me wrong, I want to embrace the power of positive thinking…. but…. It just is NOT TRUE, at least not all of the time. Sure, I tried to tell myself it was true for a while. I might have even had myself convinced, after all I can be pretty persuasive.
The excuses didn’t put a ding in my idea vision for a while. The dishes are dirty because the baby nursed all day long…………. The floor didn’t get vacuumed because I didn’t want to wake her……Buttered egg noodles for dinner because she is just so darn cute I couldn’t put her down.
But eventually reality had to set in. Did I have the perfect sweet calm baby who smiled and laughed? Sometimes. She also wore some adorable outfits. The nursing perfectly…well that took a while. Beyond that sometimes my sweet baby was not so calm. Sometimes she cried, a lot, for no apparent reason. Did we have picnics in the park? Um, no. But we were able to go and play and have fun at the park as a family once she was like 8 months old. The gourmet meals and spotless house? (Cough, cough) Sure if spaghetti and “Yes, I did manage to get the laundry put into the dryer” counts, then yes.
I think the biggest obstacle was learning that having a baby changes things more than just what you cook for dinner. I had to learn how to be mommy and wife. We had to learn what it meant to parent together. Expectations change. It was (and is) difficult. But that’s okay. It comes with the territory.
I absolutely love being a mom. It is the most challenging, unpredictable, life altering thing. It is the only thing that can turn my horrible day into a wonderful one with one little smile. Is it exactly what I had imagined (pretended) it would be when I was big and pregnant? Not exactly, but it sure is something awesome.