Starting a blog has been a long time goal of mine. I put it off for years because I was intimidated to start. I wasn’t sure how to set it up and I used that as an excuse to not start. Truthfully, I think most of my fear centered around how starting a blog might change my natural desire to write. I don’t really do well under pressure. I had concerns that once I started I would feel pressure to constantly write new posts or write nothing at all. One of my faults is that I can resort to that black and white thinking.
I am not sure exactly what finally pushed me to take the leap. I guess I was feeling now or never (see more black and white thinking). I have loved to write since I was a child. It has always been an outlet for me. From fictional stories as a young girl, to dramatic poems as a teen, and even a small novel (which I have no idea where I put that!). I want this for me. I want to put my thoughts and feelings down. It isn’t about how many people choose to read, or trying to become famous, or even making money. This is for me. I don’t really do many things just for me nowadays. I think I may need to read this post from time to time, if that pressure to write like this is for someone else creeps in.
The name of the blog came to me almost instantly. Crazy is kind of obvious. Life is crazy unpredictable. Kids are crazy in the good kind of way, making everything very different. Crazy was just the first word that came to mind. So why joyful? It certainly is not because I am always joyful. If I am being honest, I have struggled with anxiety and depression much of my life. I think joyful felt right because I want to remind myself to find the joy. And if I can’t find it, then to cultivate some. It is up to me to make the most of this crazy life. Joyful is a reminder word as well. A word to hold me accountable for my thoughts about things that I cannot control.
So that is how I got here. I will write when I feel like I need an outlet to think out loud. I will write about what I feel like I need to say. This is for me and only me. I welcome any readers along my journey, maybe we will learn something together.